So who’s fault is that?

Lawyers don’t like to accept responsibility for anything, especially millennial associate attorneys….It’s always someone else’s fault.  Losing your temporary order hearing is like having your heart ripped out from under you.  You can’t breath.  You worry what can I do now?  Is it over?  Should I take my kids and run to Brazil?  Alot of thoughts can go through a person’s mind when they lose custody and they know they shouldn’t have lost.  Many times it is rightfully the lawyer’s fault.  Either the lawyer didn’t prepare well enough or submitted poor quality material.  It happens, but not as much as you think.  Usually, the number one reason you lost was because of you.  I know you don’t want to hear that but since I’m not your lawyer I can tell you that.  It is most likely because of you.  You probably fidgeted in the courtroom or sighed or rolled your eyes or said something disrespectful to the judge.  Judges have huge egos, the only ones with bigger egos are commissioner pro tems.  I’ve watched people get hauled to jail because they smarted off to a judge.  You must control your emotions.  Did you smart off to the judge’s clerk?  Guess what happens when you do that?  The clerk goes and tells the judge.  Maybe you wore cutoffs to court and offended the judge’s ego.  In truth, a judge almost sent me home once too, so I’m not innocent here either.  Maybe you didn’t get your material to your attorney when he asked for it.  Or maybe you weren’t available when he needed your signature for the responsive declaration.   Or maybe you didn’t submit enough evidence.  There’s a million reasons why you may have lost.  Focusing on that is really, really, a huge waste of your time.

Since I lost my temporary order hearing, should I throw in the towel?

Are you in this or not?  If you are going to let the temporary order hearing beat you, do you cower when a woman says no to going out with you?  Are you a man or not?   Litigation is not the time for people who can’t hack it.  Litigation is tough.  It’s emotionally difficult.  It requires focus.  And it requires that you make decisions about your case with solid facts and an understanding of both the law and the system.  You can’t make good decisions when you are feeling sorry for yourself.  You are going to have to snap out of it and focus.

What if I have more money or they do?

Only the really good lawyers will admit that money matters.  Most like to say it doesn’t so that they save face in front of the judge because they are worried the judge will learn that they really think that money does matter in the court system.  Here’s my answer: money is the single biggest factor that can make or break your case.  With the proper resources, I can turn just about any case around, but that means proper resources.  A $5,000 retainer isn’t going  to get you anywhere when you have ground to make up after losing a temporary order hearing.  If you are going to fight this thing, you’ve got 3 options: 1) quit., 2) throw some money at it and hope to mitigate your loses, or 3) never give up.  Major corporations and my really smart clients choose option 3.

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