Not all co-parenting arrangements work in the best interests of partners and children.  Very often, Seattle family lawyers find that parents may be unable to separate their marital issues from their role as parents. This can introduce plenty of conflict in an already delicate child custody situation.

A new study focuses on different co-parenting styles. The study analyzes why some people are able to have more effective co-parenting arrangements, while others frequently find themselves in conflict with their ex-spouses.

The researchers analyzed 20 women who shared custody of the children with their ex-partners or spouses.  The researchers classified the co-parenting relationships that these women had with the fathers of their children as continuously contentious, amicable and bad-to-better.

The researchers found that as many as 45% of the women said that they were in “continuously contentious” co-parenting relationships.  In these relationships, the women express the inability to sometimes separate marital grudges from their responsibilities as parents.  They also reported strong conflict over money.  Eight of the nine parents who reported “continuously contentious” co-parenting said that that they were forced into a co-parenting arrangement that they had never opted for.

Not all was bad news.  4 of the 20 women said that they had amicable co-parenting relationship with the fathers of their children.  In these arrangements, the women got along well with their ex-spouses, and money was not a source of conflict between them.  The difference seems to be that these women wanted to share custody with their ex-partners.

The most interesting group was the last group, which reported a slow progression of co-parenting from bad-to-better.  These women initially suffered conflict with their ex-partners, but the arrangement improved substantially over a period of time.  They were able to establish communication with each other, and work jointly for the benefit of the child.

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